Best friend as wedding coordinator
The Bride Link
Editorial Category: 
Date: 
Friday, September 4, 2020

Why You Shouldn't Hire Your Friends To Work Your Wedding

Why You Shouldn't Hire Your Friends to Work Your Wedding

Today we're talking all about why you should not hire your friends to work at your wedding. Don't fall for this common wedding mistake couples make to save on costs! Having friends or family work the day of your event is one of the biggest wedding regrets couples feel. Join us for useful tips and a few stories about what I've seen is a wedding planner when friends are hired to work the event. Don't forget to grab your FREE copy of our Ceremony Cheat Sheet to help get your ceremony planning started!

The number one reason you shouldn't hire your friends to work your wedding is they may not be as experienced as a professional wedding vendor.

Even though they might be giving you a good deal or gifting you their services for free, you might not be getting the level of service that you would expect. Services like photography, DJ, or catering all have a significant impact on the day of your event. It's critical on the day of your wedding, everything runs smoothly and, more importantly, on-time. An inexperienced friend or family member may end up costing you more in the end. If they are not prepared on the day of your wedding, there is little you can do to help or fix it.

Even friends who are professionals may be more lackadaisical about your wedding since you're such good friends. It's really easy to prioritize they're paying customers over your wedding. It would be easy to assume that you would understand, or because you are not paying (or paying full price), why should they give you the same level of service? 

The second reason why you shouldn't hire your friends is that you want your friends to enjoy your wedding and not have to work it!

An excellent example of this is photography. When your photographer is your best friend or relative, they'll know most people at the wedding. Because they're friends with them too, they begin to lose focus on their task and the reason they are there. Instead of capturing once in a lifetime images, they instead start visiting with friends, mingling and enjoying the celebration. I've seen a photographer walk around with a beer in hand, catching up with old friends for over an hour while the reception went on!

I couldn't stop thinking about how many pictures the bride and groom missed out on because they had a friend as a photographer instead of hiring a professional. Another example is when a photographer brought his family (children) to an engagement session. The photographer frequently stopped to capture pictures of his children. He was friends with the couple and said it was such a beautiful backdrop at the venue that he couldn't resist. Again, while he was enjoying time with his family, he was also taking away from the couple.

The biggest issue should not be a surprise and its all about money.

Now, this subject alone can cause awkward conversations. Money can always be a weird subject with people and especially when you're talking with friends and family. When a friend or loved one offers their services to you, are they offering it as a gift? Is there a friends and family discount? What if their quote is more expensive than what you wanted to pay? Do you feel like you should expect the same level of service if they've gifted it to you? Are you expecting it to be free or heavily discounted? It can be a bizarre conversation to have with somebody close to you, especially when discussing the way they earn a living. The service they provide is something they're passionate about, and you don't want to offend anybody. 

How can it get worse?

What if you do hire them, and then you're not happy with their services? What if your wedding pictures are blurry, fuzzy, or have insufficient lighting? What if they were a distracted DJ, catching up with friends, and they missed a critical timing for your event. Or worse, they came utterly unprepared with the wrong or missing equipment? Having a conversation later about your dissatisfaction with their services could ruin your friendship. Also, if you're not happy with their services during the planning stages, it's not easy to fire them. Then, do they even know if they're still invited to the wedding? 

All of these reasons combined can make it difficult working with friends as vendors for your celebration. You, as the couple, miss the opportunity for a wedding experience that is stress-free. An experience where you don't have to worry if somebody is thoroughly prepared will show up on time and will stay focused from the start of your wedding to the end. You wouldn't have to worry about awkward conversations regarding money or refunds when you hire a professional. A professional has a successful system in place due to previous experience and repetition.

Professionals add additional value to what they offer because they can guarantee a product or service that can be implemented with success when it counts. Often numerous things go unaccounted for when a friend or family member is given responsibility for service. For instance, having insurance in case their food causes guests to become ill. Did they apply, finalize, and purchase all permits required? Does your venue allow you to hire individuals instead of a business? A professional has answered all these questions beforehand. In contrast, a friend or a family member has no idea what may be required. 

These are just some of the reasons we recommend hiring a professional for critical areas of your wedding( if it's in your budget, higher an expert for everything)! You'll feel so much less stress when you're getting into your wedding dress, knowing that professionals are taking care of everything.

If it's just not in the budget, you can look into hiring friends, but first, look at your budget and ask if there's anything you can cut. Do you need favors over a real DJ? Should you be purchasing three gorgeous wedding cakes when you can deal with one and hire a real photographer? Make sure that you're not spending money in areas that you don't need. Hiring a pro ensures the success of your event! 

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